resume

is done. done, done, done, done. i just saw a lady from the production floor in the bathroom. she was telling me how stupid the people are here (two plants combined into one - we all moved, but most of us were shown the door first) she also made the comment that i am wasting my brain here. hahaha i haven't talked to her for weeks and she has that to say to me. she's always had great timing. will it work if i use that in an interview as the reason for leaving my current job? heh. tonight i shall celebrate by meeting the girl's coworker's lesbian sister. i think he is expecting to catch us doing some sort of secret handshake or something. currently i am going to place my resume in an email and send it to "world".

for

me to give respect at the office, i demand that you are able to do at least one of the following things:
- spell, you can at least use spell check
- speak, "they don't have nothing" ANYTHING! YOU DUMB FUCKING IDIOT! ANYTHING!
- make a complete sentence
- have common sense
- make some decisions on your own
- change a tiff to a jpg
- use a computer for five minutes without asking for help
- not eat smelly food at your desk and put the leftovers in your open air trash
- not call a meeting for every single issue
- don't call me angela; especially when you called me andrea five minutes ago
- don't tell me to take notes for you or go make copies
- don't tell me that you need something immediately and then never use it
- don't repeat yourself or keep looping one thing to make conversation

bubble

lights flashing behind me is nothing new. i have what is called a led foot. i was born with it. in missouri i made a bit of a reputation for myself with those long stretches of empty roads and lots of places for cops to hide. (is "cops" bad? when i wrote it something flashed in my mind that they don't find that respectable.....hmmm i dunno) i was even pulled over once for doing the speed limit. the officer said to me back then "do you know why i pulled you over?" i said "actually no. i set my cruise control on the speed limit. maybe something is wrong with my odometer." he said "you were doing exactly the speed limit and that's why i pulled you over. that's suspicious behavior." i said "if i was going over the speed limit you would have pulled me over and if i was going under the speed limit you would have pulled me over and now you're pulling me over for doing the speed limit?" in my mind i was thinking that this guy needed to pick up some hobby to do while he sits on the lonely roads waiting for some action. my friends thought it might have something to do with him being young and us being three chicks in a convertible on a friday night. i think it might have something more to do with me wearing an army helmet and them wear swim caps and goggles. another time i was wearing a purple feather boa and it was flapping in the wind. i got pulled over for that too. i found that event interesting because i didn't have my seat belt on and neither did gerkenbower. i got a ticket for not having mine on, but she didn't because when he asked her why she told him that it was stuck in the door. what! that's the worst excuse ever! aren't you suppose to figure all that out before the car starts to move? she still won't confess that she winked at him, but i know that she did something. anyway, i'm well into double digits with speeding tickets. i've only had three since i've lived in illinois which is around six years. i find that completely amazing. i've been so good. well, my definition of good is lucky. so this morning a cop followed me for a mile or so and finally pulled me over and told me that i was speeding five minutes ago. he came back with just a warning for me because my record was pretty clean. all of that hard work and fine paying and no recognition? my heart is broken.

gerkenbower

pic
she picked us for highschool instead of that river rat town school. we would spent hours in the car singing duets until other people got in. then there would be silence. we always pick up where we left off no matter how much time it has been. don't play cards with us.

walgreen's

called to me as i drove past it last night, so i pulled in to look for a photo frame. they have exactly what i have been looking to buy for the past few weeks, but they didn't have the right size. so instead i walked out with a high tech toilet plunger. i'm a sucker for upgrades of things that i already have and don't ever use. i was explaining to the girl about my excitement of it and she did her duty of pretending to be as excited and picked it up and started examining it (right after she asked if i had used it yet). then she hollered down the hallway "did you get this at a religious store?" inscribed on the side of the handle is "Get a handle on life. John 3:16" great. i don't even know if that is a real verse or not or whatever, but me no likey. it seems that i may have gone out of my way to help some church build a bigger church or put more lobbyist into action. can i still have a green beer with everyone on thursday without any dirty looks? i've been trying to "eat right", but the yogurt is just taunting me. today when i opened the lid, yogurt splashed all over me. take that stain guard pants!