ring,

ring, ring...."i'm not here right now......blah, blah, blah...........thanks and have a quality day!." this is what i just got to hear when i called a guy at another company that works for the quality department. really. try to be a little bit more lame. also today, i was looking at some warranty returns and one was described to have the following problem "cruise control won't operate sometimes when it rains and sometimes when it is dry out". hmmmm.....my guess is that the weather isn't really the problem, but thanks for the precise information. one time i was visiting the glorious gm. of course everything runs smoothly, people are happy, nice and of the intellectual elite at their facilities. i was handed a switch that had a chunk of freezer tape on it that stated "piece of shit" and nothing else. let me figure out the problem with that one right away. p.s. i still have that switch and i never did anything with it. it's my little trophy.

lunch

was all about cash. usually right before the lunch rush, sometimes fast food restaurants add an extra drawer or two. well, i went to mcdonald's today and the man in front of me was yelling that he gave the kid a $20 and he didn't get his change back. the kid replied with "sir, i thought it was a $5." the man then opened his wallet and showed it like every wallet is suppose to have at least 1 $20 in it at all times and everyone could plainly see that he had used his. well, the kid had the manager come over. she opened the drawer and then picked it up to show him that it was a fresh drawer and that there weren't any $20s in it at all. he replied with "oh. i guess i'm having a bad day." then walked away without giving any apologies to the kid he had just screamed at. i then dashed to target and got some cash back with my purchase and as i walked out the door i was separating the cash from the receipt and i dropped the cash, but didn't notice it until i was across the street. i wouldn't have noticed at all, but i couldn't feel it so i dug through my pants pocket for it. i could see it so i played frogger with the traffic to get to it before the wind or someone else. i use to lose cash all of the time. i remember always counting and being confused. i found $10 once when i was running through a ditch. don't ask.

paybacks

are a bitch. during the christmas season i hid the girl's gifts around the house in cabinets and drawers and such. i teased her like crazy about it too. well, she informed me last night that my anniversary gift is in the closet, my part of the closet and has been there for a few days. why haven't i seen it yet? well, a) i try to use the clean clothes that are in a pile on the floor first so i don't have to hang them up, b) i only get in there in the morning when my eyes are half shut and the room is dark so that i don't wake the sleeping and c) i assume it's on the end of the closet where the undecided clothes live - i don't really want to wear them, but i might need them so i don't want to give them away. from the other side of the room i looked in the closet, but she told me that i wouldn't be able to see it from there. then i promised that i wouldn't go digging to look for it. this morning i turned on the light in the closet to see what i was picking out from the pile and naturally i scanned the closet with my eyes (no hands!) and i still couldn't see anything!! maybe she moved it after i crashed for the evening. either way, it's driving me crazy. i want to just rip all the clothes down and see what's in there, but i said i wouldn't. come to think of it, my mom use to do the same thing. i had a couch in my room so all the clean clothes lived there. she would have to tell me that my gift was in there. closets are a waste of space for me, unless i'm having company, then it's a goldmine. never look in there if you come over. hahahahaha i just compared you to my mom......take that!!

all

of this bathroom talk has reminded me of another story that i hold dear to my heart. i went to our plant in mexico with three other coworkers from here. we went out to eat and had some drinks with our coworkers from there. we then hit the border at a peak time and the line was long, long, long. i was all cozy in the back of the van when i heard the driver talking about having to pee really bad and he didn't think he was going to make it. i wasn't with bosses or anything and these people were pretty cool so i proposed that i would take the driver seat and he can empty his bladder into my empty water bottle in the back of the van. technically, i wasn't worried about his well being....i just wanted to see if he would do it. it took some convincing and promising that we wouldn't look, listen or tell anyone at work and he went for it. i cranked up the radio and i could still hear him a bit. it was awesome!!! the other girls were laughing their asses off. he was all nervous frantic when he finished, but later said that he felt a ton better and it saved him. instead of having wet pants...he only had a little bit of wetness on his shoe. i became a front seat sitter.

that

was boring and told me nothing. it was full of quotes made by other people and lists of movies and tv shows. lame ones. heh. the bathroom here at work has about 15 stalls in it. i chose the first one on my last visit and someone came in right behind me and took the one next to it. WHY???!? in those situations i go way to the other end. give a girl some room if you can. damn! i think i'm suppose to measure some parts or something today. maybe if i pretend that they aren't laying out on my desk next to a drawing with all of the specifications all highlighted for me, i can continue my day without having to get up from my warm chair. then i can just deal with it tomorrow. "oh, you wanted me to measure those? i couldn't tell what they were on my desk for." i want in on that whole blonde thing. they have us all fooled and they don't ever have to do anything or take real responsibility. they just point at their hair and give a blank look smile. "i thought the one way sign meant that i couldn't turn around and come back."

today

i have made the choice to entertain myself by reading a blog of a person that i probably shouldn't, but i guess i'm into self torture. you see, i know what this girl looks like and i've heard a few stories here and there about her, but i don't know her and i feel like i should since i sleep with what is technically her stuffed animal every night. she's a web designer so at first look i've already been intimidated. what am i looking for? i don't know. i guess mainly i am curious and there is this sick need for me to compare us. i know i shouldn't do that with only a glossy cover available, but a little head numbing never hurt anyone.